21 Indispensable Qualities of A Leader — Quality # 1: Be A Piece of the Rock

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about Leadership, in part down to personal circumstances but also thanks to some leadership decisions at my football club, Sunderland AFC. It got me asking the question again, just what makes a good leader.

Whenever I have a question like this, I normally try and find a book that I can read to gain some insight from. Thankfully I already have purchased a book in the past (ironically after a recommendation from the previous Sunderland Manager Jack Ross), and it was John C Maxwell’s “21 Indispensable Qualities of A Leader”. I started reading it a while ago and never finished, so I decided to pick it up and read it from the start again.

This time however, I’ve decided to write a blog post about each quality, detailing what the book talks about, but also trying to apply it to myself and how I work, to give a unique and personal insight into it.

I can’t promise a blog post a day, but i can promise a blog post on each quality. Keep checking back for further updates….

Quality # 1: Be A Piece of the Rock

Delving into the chapter a little bit more, it talks about how your character is key to being a good leader. People can feign character for a short period of time, but when the going gets tough, that’s when people’s true character comes out.

I think I’ve seen this multiple times, more so most recently, where I’ve seen leaders in the political space behaving somewhat questionable as the pressure is building. The book sums it up with a rather nice quote:

Crisis doesn’t necessarily make character, but it certainly does reveal it.

It then goes on to talk a little bit about how we all have a choice, we all have a choice whether to take the easy road or stick to our beliefs and character, even when it might be hard.

I’ve got a similar story of when I was working with a team, I’d identified that we were missing a huge piece in our automation work, we were unable to verify a deployment until after it had been switched live. This was contrary to what we believed and what I had spoken about previously. It would have been easy for me to fix it on the side, or keep things moving forward. Instead, I decided to raise the alarm bells, out of that it was decided to stop for a week, and actually implement the solution that we wanted properly, to give us confidence in our deployments. It was a difficult decision to make, it was one that meant people questioned things, especially as I had previously stated otherwise. I learnt an important lesson from this, to always be sure of what I’m talking about. The quote in the book that sums this up relatively nicely is below.

You have to often choose two paths character or compromise.

Strong leaders choose character.

It’s quite nice as well, in that it talks about how we are born with certain traits, certain abilities. We are born with a certain level of IQ, we are born with a certain appearance and we are all born with different talents. We have no choice in that matter. What we do however have a choice in, is the development of our character. We make that choice on a regular basis. Like any development though, it can be hard work. Sticking to your character can be challenging, but it’s rewarding. We all want to develop and better ourselves.

Development of character is at the heart of being human.

If I look back at myself over the past 3 years, my character has evolved a lot. I used to be more self centred. I used to believe a Leader had to be great at everything they did, they had to know everything. I realised a while ago, that it’s not that at all. I started reading 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and it made me look at myself, at the things that are important to me, which made me realised I get so much more gratification from helping and enabling others.

The book then talks about some things to know about character, and all of which I agree with.

1. Character is about actions, not talk. We can all talk and say we going to do the right things. Character determines not just who we are, but also what we see, which in turn determines what we do and how we (re)act.
2. Our Character is a choice we make on a regular basis. We have no choice over a lot of things talent for instance is a gift. Sure we develop it, but some people are just born with talent. We do however have a choice with our character. We make decisions every day that determine our character. Every day is an opportunity to build character no matter the circumstances.
3. It is character brings lasting success with people. True leadership involves other people. There’s a wise old proverb that states “If you think you are leading but there is no one following, you’re probably just taking a walk”. Followers will follow people whose character resonates with them, who they can trust and relate to.
4. Highly talented people can and will fall apart after a level of success, it is character which prevents this from happening. It’s known as the success syndrome, people who have this, suffer from one of four A’s: Arrogance, painful feelings of Aloneness, destructive Adventure seeking or Adultery

One thing I’ve learnt over the past few years, is that character is possibly the most important asset as a leader, it’s not my technical skills, it’s not my friendliness, it comes down to having strong sense of character, and sticking to that character. Which I think, having read the chapter title again, is what it’s all about, sticking to your character, no matter the adversity.

Poldark in prison. When the easiest option would have been to turn his back on his character and sign a piece of paper.

There was a scene in Poldark, (yes I’ve watched it and love it ❤) where Poldark is sentenced to death, he could sign something that he disagrees with, and isn’t true of his character, which would exonerate him and set him free, but he refused to. His character wouldn’t allow it. In the end he was saved, but it’s a testament to his character as a leader that stood out for me.

So having spoken a bit about character, and why it’s important, the book also talks about how to go about improving your character. The book helpfully points out some ways at which you can assess and improve it.

1. Search for the cracks — look at your life, work, marriage, family, community etc. Identify areas where you’ve cut corners. If I look for the cracks in my life, there have also been times over the past few months where I haven’t been as positive as I could have been at work when talking to others. There are also times when I am not fully present with my children. These are the first two that come to mind, but I’m sure there are more.
2. Look for patterns — Examine the responses and see if there’s a particular area. So looking at the above, they are two very different cracks, that isn’t to say that I’m not going to address them.
3. Face the music — Create a list of people that you need to apologise for your actions. If we look at my children, then I need to apologise and have done to them. I have also made a Pinky Promise with my youngest to not be on my phone when I am with them. They’re only young once, so it’s definitely something that is important.
4. Rebuild — It’s all very well facing up to your post actions, it takes a bit more to properly rebuild what you have may have lost. But if you are dedicated and committed, then you will rebuild and be stronger than before.

The chapter finishes with a Daily Takeaway.

Be bigger on the inside than in the outside.

The story attached to it is how a girl at a fair bought a big bag of candy floss. Her Dad said to her “Are you sure you’re going to eat all that?” to which she promptly replied “I’m bigger on the inside than the outside”.

That’s what character is all about, our character can have overarching effects/implications, by staying true to it, we at least aren’t going to be regretting any decisions that we may make. It’s only when our character is called into question that we may have second thoughts about our actions.